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| I went here: http://www.livejournal.com/users/bountyofbones/
If anyone ever reads this thing.. | | |
| Ok I'm not normally the kind of person to flaunt my business to everyone but, I'm at the point in my life where I just dont care. I dont want sympathy and I'm not trying to get attention. I just really need to hear what other people might do in my situation.
Heres some background: I met this guy when I was 15 fell in "love" and into Hep C, herion addiction, traveling and being a gutterpunk.... but when I was 18 and seeing my life flash before my eyes I decided I didnt want to be in a gutter, in L.A. away from everyone I cared about. Came home to get clean, the guy didnt want to so I left him and started anew. I am 20 and I've completely turned my life around. A situation arouse about 3 months ago that I had to take. Theres a treatment to cure Hep C... but its a year long and it makes you feel like you have the flu. Well Now in comes my problem. I've been on this about a couple months, and I had some blood work done. My doctor called me this morning to tell my my thyroid is underactive, on a small percentage of people on the treatment have this problem ( OF COURSE! ) if I stop the treatment there will be no permenant damage but if I keep going I will have to take meds for the rest of my life to make my thyroid normal. ANOTHER problem is there slightly over a 60% chance of me being cured with this treatment. I need help, just tell me what you would do if you were me... and please pray for me, wish me luck, think of me... etc
Thanks,
Lindsey | | |
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This is my baby. Her name is Eve, and she makes me incredibly happy. Other then my bf Jay I dont think any living creature has ever made me so happy. Insane I guess. Jay cant see how I love her so much, and that she's "Just a dog". Thats ok..
Well God has blessed my life so much since I last wrote here. I have gotten out of most of my debts, school was going GREAT, I'm starting my treatment for Hep C, Jay proposed to me ( ring and all )... yet I'm depressed as ever. I dropped all my classes because its getting to me so much... lame, I know. But, ever since my liver biopsy everything has hit me hard. Anyways, I hate crying about this stuff. Point being, I quit school, my job, to do this treatment and all I have is my puppy and Jay to make me happy.... | | |
| "Honor your father and mother. Then you will live a long, full life in the land the Lord your God will give you."
-Exodus 20:12
For me, that is the hardest commandment to live by. One I dont know my father, which makes it hard not to speak badly of him. I do my best. My mother is.... well.... "not right in the head" I love her and I am thankful for all she has put up with. My mom was 19 when she got pregnant with me, everyone on my fathers side wanted me aborted, my grandma even gave my mom the money to abort me, everyone on my moms side said they supported her no matter what. So basically no one cared to have me around, and my mom stood by me when no one else did. That I am so thankful for. My mom said she walked in the clinic and couldnt do it.. something told her to leave. That something I'd like to believe is God. I'm not really going to go into detail about whats happened in my life from then on but, my mom tried. She was a baby raising a baby.
Anyways, my point. I had my liver biopsy March 10th. I told my mom about it RIGHT when I knew. She even seemed worried and wanted to be there. We were scheduling times and everything that she'd be there. I dont know weather it was forces of God or darker things telling me to do this but I needed to know where I stood with my mom, so I told her and that was it. I waited till that day came..... and she was nowhere to be seen not even a phone call. Jay's mom showed up and remembered, which made me feel like crap that my OWN mother forgot. I waited a couple more days till I asked her about it. Well, she flew off the handle at me.... and SOME HOW made ME ( ME!! ) feel guilty about her not showing up. She started cursing at me and throwing things from my past up in my face. It took EVERYTHING I had to hold my tongue as much as I did, I still said somethings I shouldnt have, but I called back and left a message saying: "I am sorry that I rehashed some things, I love you and I am thankful for the life you gave me but I cant handle this anymore. When you can be the mother you were intended to be... give me a call. I love you."
........ was I wrong? | | |
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